Dreamscapes

First and foremost I would like to say hi I have a headache. Second I need to talk about this really weird dream I had last night.
*DREAM*
Katie, Erin, James and I decided we were going to go to this barbeque place because Katie's dad had recommended it. So of course in the dream I was very wasted and we go into the barbeque place only to find out it's a japanese barbeque and not like texas barbeque. So James sits down and starts eating this weird grilled whole fish. Well just as the rest of us are getting our food Katie's dad like comes into the restaurant to surprise her. That really has nothing to do with the rest of the dream I just thought it was kind of weird because I've never even met Katie's dad lol. Well them I start to eat my Japanese soup but I am eating it with chopsticks and so I spill some on katie's jeans and she starts yelling at me about how it's going to stain and she doesn't have any spray and wash. Then I start yellingback that soup doesn't stain! Then I like storm out of the restaurant and go to this really cold bus depot and sit outside on a bench with a blanket waiting for a train to take me away.
*END OF DREAM*

I used caps lock because I think it's very important to always seperate reality from my twisted subconcious. There was also a part in my dream where I was at a club and I was dirty dancing with plies but that's besides the point.

Last night was such a good night!!!! First Jerret and I played some 007 on the N64 then we played mario kart and then we had power hour. The best part of the night I think though was during 007 when we were playing this really lame level and we had decided to go through all of the weapon choices so we were on sniper and this particular level we could never find each other. So Jerret starts like rapping to the beat of the music and the song goes a little something like this:

"Dark Chocolate" (this is a temporary name btw)
starring: Lil Wayne, Plies, Missy Elliot, Chris Brown, and Justin Timberlake

Dark chocolate (ahhhhhhh)
Dark chocolate (ahhhhhhh)
Dark chocolate dark chocolate dark chocolate

Fucking all night
Dark chocolate
Fucking all night
Dark chocolate

(there's a lot more in the middle we just haven't come up with it yet)

Then we made up a verse for Missy Elliot:
You want some choclate chips?
Jump on my chocolate hips
Then suck my chocolate nips
Come get yo suga fix

That's all we have so far. Jerret also has another song called Ceo's and seceratary hoes. GOD I AM SO HUNGRY I HOPE MY PARENTS GET HERE SOON!

When I Was Broke I Had To Hustle 'Til Dawn

I cleaned my room up yesterday. Well kinda. I washed all my clothes, my sheets, cleaned off my desk, and picked up all the trash. Now I just need to take the trash out, straighten up, and then vacuum. Anyways I took my business test today and I don't think I did all that bad considering how little I actually pay attention during that class. Mostly I just doodle and sleep, and I probably wouldn't even be sleepy if he didn't turn the lights out during the lecture! I think that should be illegal because it just really sets the mood especially when it's the first class of the day!

Anyways James just came over and we talked for a little while because I didn't see him all weekend(can you believe that?!?!). Now I'm about to take a nap because that's just what I do, and then I will probably hang out with James or Katie tonight and get some reading done for English because I am way behind the times in that class. LESS THAN ONE MONTH OF SCHOOL LEFT! YAY!

The Truth Is You Could Slit My Throat

I feel like shit. I know you all probably think that I'm a hypochondriac or something but honestly I spent all night shivering and shaking and sweating in my bed. On top of that I'm having some serious gastro-intestinal upset. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me because this is the second time this past week I've been sick and the second time I've had these same exact symptoms this past month. James said it might be from stress, and I mean I'm stressed out alot but I don't think I have so much stress that it would make me physically ill. Ugh whatever. I'm tired of it I really am.

Ya'll are probably also thinking "well it's because she's drunk" but I'll have you know I haven't had a drop to drink since thursday night. I don't plan on drinking anytime soon either. I decided that if I spend 6/7 nights of the week drunk then I probably should cool it. The funny thing is I make it to class a lot more often with a hangover than without.

Anyways I'm going to go take a shower and then go check my mail to see if my phone has made it.......................I've spent almost 7 whole days without a cell phone. I didn't even think that was possible!!!!!

Haircuts & Bras

Yesterday was interesting to say the least. It was showcase Saturday and I woke up at around one and went to have a cigarette and there were like 900000000 people in the Steen Lobby yelling and in my way. So then I took a shower and was going to study but it just so happens that one of the rooms on my floor was being used as a tour room and so people were so damn loud so I went to the library for about an hour just to write up some flashcards and catch up on some English readings. Then I went over to Hall 14 to see Jenaynay but she was really busy so I went over to Katie's apartment in Garner and then we went and had lunch and picked Jen up so that we could go to Lufkin because Katie really needed a new bathing suit. While we were at Target somehow Jen convinced me to buy a bra and it's the first real bra I've had in like 2 years and I really like it although I must say it's really rough not even being a B-cup but oh well.

Then we went back to Nacogdoches and went to Hastings and this is when the night took a turn for the worse. We were in Hastings talking to Erin because she was working and probably bored out of her mind and I was telling a story or something and I kept hearing these guys behind this shelf mocking me so finally I had enough and I was like "HEY ASSHOLES! I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU!" and they were like "what did we do we weren't even talking about you!" and so then I literally yelled at the top of my lungs at them and then stormed out of Hastings. I really haven't been that angry in a long time. So then we went back to Steen and I checked my facebook because I had added this guy that I thought was cute who lives in Jen's dorm and I had seen him around before. Well anyways we had messaged back and forth for a while and then he asked if I wanted to hang out which I assumed meant like go out somewhere so I was like "yeah that sounds great, where do you want to hang out?" and these were his exact words verbatim: "My room! I stay n Hall 14 461! U can come later 2nite! How late u goin b up 2nite? U can jus stay if u want!" I mean seriously I know I'm not the most innocent looking girl in the world but does this guy honestly think that I am going to come over to his room and spend the night and I don't even know him?!?!?!?!?! I was so angry. So Katie and I decided to rent movies and get a lot of food. So we started to watch the movie when Jamesie came by because we had told him we would cut his hair because he has his baptism/confirmation today(which is why I'm up so early blogging by the way). Well anyways we cut his hair and we were laughing so hard because he looks like Julie Andrews from the sound of music. Like when he saw it he goes "I look gay!!! I look sooooooo gay!" and we were like "James you are gay" but I mean the more I get used to it the better it is and I learned what my mistake was I accidentely cut his bangs way too short, but oh well. Needless to say I don't think he'll ever come to me for a haircut again. Well I have to get ready to go to the church for his baptism. If you read this far you truly are my hero!

You Never Call Me When You're Sober

I'm not trying to be cynical but I hate spring in Nacogdoches. There are way too many creatures. Huge raccoons that prowl the dumpsters at night and attack at will, Ants the size of hamsters, Cockroaches that could eat your face right off, and mysterious ninja frogs and lizards that try to jump on you while you're outside trying to enjoy a cigarette. Don't even get me started on the rogue squirrels that are always trying to steal your food!!!!! I hate it!!!!!!!!!!

Last night was pretty good. Katie, Erin, Jen, Kory and I went to see Alvin and the Chipmunks and it was such a cute movie!! Even though it was a movie about talking and singing chipmunks it was still really funny. Then after that Jen, Erin, Katie, Marie, Allison and I stayed and watched Sweeney Todd which I must say is a fucking kick-ass movie!!!! It's really really really gruesome and I love it!!!!!

Anyways here's a funny story to leave you all with:

Erin and I were outside of Steen waiting for James to come down because we were going to walmart because erin needed a new fan and I needed some cigarettes and I was smoking this swisher sweet cigar because I was obviously out of cigarettes and this guy walked by and was like "Are you smoking a blunt?!?!" and I was like "yep" and then he walked into steen and about five minutes later he came back out and was like "can I take a few hits?" and erin and I started laughing and I was like "I was just kidding man it's just a cigar" and he laughed and was like "damn man you had me convinced!!" and then walked away. It was so funny!

About A Boy

I'm still very homesick, but this post is not about that it's about my day so get ready!

I woke up at nine like I said I would and I went to all of my classes like I said I would. I'm very proud of myself. I went to biology lab and saw hot lab assistant and it was just me and this boy named dwight who is very funny. I was glad potato head bitch didn't come. The experiment took forever and I was so glad to get out of there. Then I went to the cafeteria to see my homegirls Marie, Jordan, and the infamous Allison Percival. Then I went with Katie to check my mail and my keys finally came in so I gave the spare one back to the front desk. Then I went and had a real dinner with Jenaynay, Eriniqua, and Kory and then my stomach started to hurt. I went back to Steen and then Katie came to see me and we went to Cane's and I didn't have any chicken because I am poor and poor people eat in the cafeteria. Then we went to Wal-mart to load up for the partayyyyy tomorrow night. Poor people drink beer. Then I went over to Hall 14 to study for the bio test tomorrow. Jen and I were in the study room with Rachel and some really weird dude who was super smart. We left to take a break and Rachel shut the door and we were locked out for thirty minutes waiting for the hall director to come back with the keys. Now I am so fucking tired I could just pass out but I decided I'll just take a shower and fix my hair so I won't have to worry about it tomorrow. Besides I still have some reading to do for English tomorrow. I'm so far behind that I'm literally frightenend. It's my own fault.

I really just don't care anymore. I'm so ready for this semester to be over. I'm so ready to have a real job so I won't be so fucking poor anymore. Anyways here are some funny things that happened today:

I went to James' room to bum a smoke and it took him like five minutes to answer the door and I was like "what are you doing? and he was like "looking at porn" and I was like "ewwww were you jacking off?" and he was like "hhahahaha yea" so I Was like "can I just have a cigarette real quick?" and he was like trying to hand me one and I was like "oh hell no let me get it myself!" and then I ran away.


Then when I was in biology lab I was asking Dwight about this guy that I've known all semester but I've only known him as T.O because he looks like Terrel Owens and that's what all the guys in the dorm call him and then last night Marcus tried to tell me his name was Conception and I didn't believe him and then I asked Dwight and Dwight was like "Yeah that really is his name, what was his mama thinking?!?!"

Anyways I'm off to shower and then I'm going to read and get some much needed sleep. If I go to bed by two I will get eight hours of sleep exactly and that will be very very very very very nice!

What Would You Do If I Sang Out Of Tune?

We saw baby Zachary yesterday and I must say that he is so freaking cute. At first he didn't talk very much but he warmed up and was talking to all of us and saying our names. He really loves my dad and he sat next to him in his highchair. My dad had got some soup and Zachary really liked it and everytime my dad went to eat some Zachary would go "DAVID!" and then laugh. I swear he ate more than I did including like a whole piece of cheesecake. He ate some chicken and mashed potatoes and he drank out of this little cup with a straw.

After we ate we went outside and we were all smoking and this old woman came up to me and was like crying saying she needed money to get to Tyler to see her sick sister at the hospital or something. So I gave her a fucking ten dollar bill because I felt so bad for her and then the woman drove off in her car and the hostess from the restaurant came out and was like telling us how that woman does that to everyone and how the cops never get there in time. I was so pissed. I wanted to murder that woman for making me feel so bad for her that I gave her a ten dollar bill. It's bullshit.

Anyways once we got home James and I drank some and then walked to the lake and watched the stars but then it got really cold so we came back to the house. We called James' little brother on the phone and he's a real big pervert. Then we watched Golden Girls and passed out. Now I'm going to take a shower so that we can get the hell out of this town.

Door Decorations & Easter Break

So Erin and I redecorated our door. You have to see it to believe it. It's even more amazing than the last door decorations.

I've been pretty busy lately just getting through life. I will post more tomorrow after I get home and clear my head. James will be with me so expect some pretty funny posts about that later!

If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now

So last night was weird to say the least. We went to watch the mavericks rockets game downstairs and the dudes that had the guns that one night were like staring at us and whispering. So we went back to my room. Then we went to James' and said goodbye to him since we probably won't see him today and I am sad.

I'm so ready to be out of nacogdoches, but what am I going to do without Jen, Erin, Katie, James, and Mariezy?!?!?! It's snowing in Nacogdoches right now, hell has officially frozen over!

Hot Dude of the Day

This is James world.

James this is the world.

Men

I hate men today. I hate penis' I hate hairy armpits I hate the smell of old spice I hate boxers I hate hypocrites I hate not being drunk.

The only man I don't hate today is James.

We had an inadvertent girls night. I wish Katie was talking to us again.

Waking Up To Another Day

My parents came to see me for a belated birthday weekend. They brought my stinky brother too. My mom made me a cake and we all went to church. Jen came too and it was the longest mass in all of the history of the world. Then we went to Jalapeno tree which is the third day in a row Jen has been there. Second day in a row for me. I was starving because I hadn't eaten since the day before. My brother told me I looked like an alchoholic drug addict who had been on a binge all weekend. Katie met us at Jalapeno Tree and it was a really good time because we had the same waiter as last time and he's just the nicest guy.

Then I gave my parents a tour and they left and I was sad.

I woke up this morning before my parents got here to take a shower and noticed the staggering amount of bruises on my arms and legs from the night before when James and I fought. I had text messaged him 14 times last night about how I never wanted to see him again. We were very mad at each other today and I seriously never wanted to see him again but before my parents left I was sitting with my dad outside of Steen because he was smoking a cigarette and James walked down the front steps and he gave me the meanest glare and I was like "OH HEY JAMES! This is my dad" and then James had to be nice to me because I mean it was my dad. So then I asked him if he was mad at me and he said he wasn't and I told him he beat me up and he said he didn't remember. So he had to leave for work and I said goodbye to my daddy and then went up to my room and texted James that I wasn't mad at him and that he really did beat me up, he still didn't believe me until I showed him all the bruises tonight. He finally apologized and I think we're even better friends now because of it. We decided that we probably shouldn't drink together and if we do that we shouldn't be so violent. Then he came back to my room for like 3 hours and I straightened his hair and we watched funny videos on youtube.

I really do love James but when I'm drunk I want to choke him and punch him for some reason. I get so angry, and I think it's because he's normally so docile and doesn't fight me back. It's really funny though because all day I've been telling people about how my gay friend beat me up.

Pitching Fits & Physical Violence

Last night (Saturday) I only wanted two things: to see James' roommate and to get crunk. I achieved both of my goals but at a price.

Katie, Jen, Allison and I all went to Lufkin because we were bored as hell and everyone left for the weekend. When we got back we decided to take some shots because we still had half a bottle of vodka left. Jen, Allison and I finished the bottle of Vodka within about 15 minutes and decided to go to James' room to get my pillow that I had left the night before and so that I could show them hot roommate. At the poing James was at work so we didn't have to worry about seeing his face until 11. Well we go to the door and were knocking and knocking and nobody answered. I threw a fit. I claimed that my vagina would explode if he wasn't there in thirty minutes. Then we went outside to smoke a cigarette and my friend Lizzie came by and picked allison and I up because we were going to hang out at her apartment. Allison and I took another shot at Lizzie's and then shotgunned a beer each. Lizzie and Chris were going to leave to go to the bar and we were gonna stay at Lizzie's apartment for a while but then Lizzie decided we were too drunk so she took us back to Steen where we called Katie and she came back. I had like 8 beers in my purse so Allison and I went back to Steen and played ghetto beer pong until we decided we were gonna go back to see if hot roommate was home yet. Well he wasn't so we asked thier neighbors if we could come into thier room and they were like "NO!" so then we were sitting on the floor in the hall and I was about to cry when some guy walked by and I was like hey can we chill in your room. He was like "okay" so we went into his room and talked to him for like 30 minutes until James got home from work. Then I took the beers and by this time I was really really really really out of control. James had just gotten off of work and had threatened to not let me into his room because I was so drunk. I gave him a beer and then he let me in. Allison and he drank another beer and I was like "JAMES GIVE ME A SIP!" and James was like "NO!" so I went to grab it out of his hand and he grabbed my arm and started wrenching it. I screamed and then tried to punch his balls and he got really angry and kicked me twice on my knee. Then supposedly he and Katie started to tell me that James had kissed his roommate and that his roommate was in love with him to make me jealous so I started choking James and he pushed me into his roommate's closet and I now have a giant bruise on my elbow! So then I was like "FINE I HATE YOU!" and we all went outside to smoke another cigarette. Well James wouldn't sit next to me he would only sit next to Allison and I was pissed off. So we all went back into Steen but somehow we got locked out of James' room and my purse was in there so Katie and I assumed that James and Allison were in there and locking us out so we were banging down the door and finally someone came and opened it, but it was not James............

IT WAS HOT ROOMMATE! I was so happy. Not only did he answer the door he let us in and for some reason we have no idea where James and Allison were at this point. So I sat on the floor and Katie was standing there and I was like talking to hot roommate and I was like "where have you been all night?" and he was like "out" and I was like " how come you didn't answer the door!" and he was like "I was in the shower" which was true because his hair was all wet. Then I said "what did you do tonight?" and he said "chilled" and then I started crying because I was really jealous that James and Allison went off without me. So then James calls on my cell phone and was like "where are you?" and I was like "in your room where the fuck are you?" and James was like "NO YOU AREN'T!" and I was like "I BET YOU A MILLION DOLLARS I AM!" and so then I hung up and cried some more. Finally they came back to his room and James was like "oh you were in here" and then I tried to punch his nuts again and he was like "IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN I'LL KICK YOU OUT!" and then I was like really angry so I turned to hot roommate and was like "I lied when I said I wanted to have sex with James I DON'T EVEN LOVE HIM!" and then hot roommate was like "oh okay" and then James said "Good because I wouldn't have sex with you, you're not even my type" and I was like "WE KNOW WHAT YOUR TYPE IS!" which is funny because his roommate doesn't know he's gay. So then James said "well my roommate wants you to get the fuck out of here" and then hot roommate smiled and waved and so I convinced James and Allison to come back to my room and then I kicked them out because I was angry. Finally I went to sleep and woke up 2 hours later because my parents were coming and I really needed to take a shower.

Funniest things from the night:
-Allison spitting in the hallway and elevator
-James and I fighting
-Telling Willie I would do his laundry
-Allison putting beer in a diet dr. pepper can
-Allison spilling beer all over my floor
-Me talking to Johnny about the bible and his hair
-Me crying and saying if I didn't see hot roommate I would die because I love him and then some girl asking how long I've known him and me replying "three days!"
-The fucking kick ass Banenis Allison drew on my arm (a penis coming out of a banana peel)
-Me telling everyone about my Banenis
-Me being jealous of James and Allison & James and his roommate
-Katie smoking a cigar and saying how stressful the night has been
-Having Jen help me clean the banenis off of my arm at like 2 am
-Text messaging James that I never want to see his face again!

Birthday Party of a Lifetime

I was pretty concernced that turning twenty was going to be traumatic. I would wake up thursday and just want to lay back down and cry. Instead Thursday was one of the greatest days I have ever had! I woke up and did my hair and got dressed. My roommate Erin had left me a happy birthday note on my desk which made me smile. I went to my two classes of the day (biology and english) I saw Jen in biology and we got out a little early and got Einstein's. Jen and I played hangman during class and worked on her experiment. Then I went to English where we talked about Ulyesses which is a poem by Alfred, Lord Tennyson. After class I went to Katie's apartment and then Katie took me out to lunch at Cane's which was really nice and delicious. We went to Wal-Mart which is always a fun experience. Then I walked her to work and I made a bet with Daniel that the Mavericks would beat the Spurs because they never lose on my birthday(well they used to never lose). Needless to say I paid Daniel a dollar yesterday.







After that I went to my room and finished cleaning up and putting up the decorations. I got lonely so I called Jen and Erin and then we were hanging out and talking and then they left to go get thier cards swiped at the ladyjacks game(in case you didn't know the more games you see the more prizes you get) Erin's probably already qualified for a free t-shirt. Just as they left Allison, Stephanie, Marie, and Stevie showed up so it was partying time. We blew bubbles and then bounced the basketball around and I ordered pizza. Erin and Jen came back and Palmer and all of the guys from next door came over just because they wanted free pizza. Everyone ate I watched some more of the basketball game and then we took the party over to Katie's apartment. Allison, Jen and I took some shots and I was pretty much gone within the first ten minutes. We tried to play King's Cup but it didn't work out very well because Jen was super ADD and nobody else knew the rules. Then James came over and that's when it started to get really funny. Just to recap you all James is my gay friend who says he doesn't like girls. We were sitting on Katie's floor and he goes "Kiss me!" and I said "Ewwwwwwwww no." and then he goes "Why is it because I'm UGLY?!?!" and I was soooooooo embarassed because the whole party stopped and everyone was looking at me in my birthday crown with my cheeks blazing. So I was like "fine" and I grabbed James face and kissed him which I remember doing but what I don't remember and what Katie had to tell me afterwards is that he was like "THAT WAS A REALLY PASSIONATE KISS!" So the rest of the night I was very angry at James and by this point I don't remember much besides me trying to choke him severel times, slapping him for flirting with Allison, and breaking two pair of sunglasses. Then Marie and Stevie left and so I was bummed and the party lasted for another 20 minutes or so before Jen and I were like not able to drink anymore and everyone else was feeling good. So Katie, Jen, Erin, James, Tim and I walked back towards Steen but Tim got mad at me for some reason and went off with Jen. So Katie Erin James and I are back outside Steen and I just wanted one last cigarette and by this time everyone was my best friend so basically anyone walking around outside of Steen was getting some loving from me. So I saw these guys that I knew because I've watched the mavericks game with them before and of course they were my "best friends" and I was hugging them and telling them that I loved them and everything. Well this is the part where it gets sort of fuzzy for me because next thing I knew I was inside Steen and this drunk girl who I had given a cigarette to was crying and Katie was crying talking about how one of the guys had a gun and said he was gonna shoot that drunk girl. I guess at the time for them it was really scary but it's just a testament to how drunk I was that I thought it was hilarious and just went to my room and peed and came back down happy as a god-damned lark. Well Katie and Erin had just called UPD and so I went with James up to his room because I really didn't want to get arrested. I tried to go to sleep because I just wanted to forget guns and life in general at this point of the night but Erin called and said the cop needed one of us to come downstairs so of course James went because he was not as drunk as I was. This is when I talked to James' roommate about how I'm supposedly in love with James. Then James comes back into the room and was like "it's time to sober up!" and I was like "noooooooooooooooo why?!?!" and it turns out the cop needed to talk to me because I supposedly knew these guys and thought they were my friends. So I went drank some water and peed and went down there and talked to that poor cop. He asked me some questions and I tried to act sober. After all of this we went back to James' room because I wanted Erin and Katie to see James' roommate who I was convinced was the hottest man on earth even though I hadn't even seen what he looked like because when I was in the room it was pitch black. So we walk into the dark room and I had my cell phone light and was flashing it in this poor boys eyes and I was like "HE IS HOTTTTTTTTT!" and then they turned on the light and he was like "hey what's up?" and it was just about the funniest thing that has ever happened to me in my life. Then I tried to steal his blanket and his pillow. He looks like a male model. I am in love. I ended up spending the nigth with James and I even woke up the next morning for my classes even though I was quite hungover.



In retrospect it was the greatest birthday party and greatest birthday ever. Wow it took my five days to write this post. Next up: Alex's Saturday night adventure with Allison.

I Am Half Sick of Shadows

My father really made me mad tonight. I hate the fact that when things go bad he cares so much, but when things are going good he doesn't give a shit. I'm not talking to him for the rest of the weekend. I just really want to be left alone. If you want to call and criticize me just save your breath because I really just don't care.

For the next six days I am going to be a teenager and I'm going to act like one. I'm going to drink on weekdays and I'm going to act like I know everything even if I'm searching for the answers. I'm going to stay up late and wake up late. I'm going to laugh at things that are funny and cry at things that hurt me. I'm going to be continuously searching for the meaning to things, only to find out that they mean nothing.

I just can't wait for my mother to be here next sunday. I know I bash her sometimes, but there are just times in a girl's life where she needs her mother. Fathers are good for some things, but mothers understand, whereas fathers are always trying to understand. Some things in life you can't just try, you have to do them.

I gave myself tatoos tonight. I busted down a door only to realize that it was the wrong one. I drew naughty pictures on Katie's dry erase board. I drank five beers and smoked a cigarette. I made prank calls and told secrets. I had a good night, and nobody can take that from me.

Why I Hate Tuesdays

I just took my biology test and I'm about to go take my Brit Lit test. Wow two tests in one day this is a first for me. I've had like four tests in one week but never two in one day. It's not very amazing or wonderful if you ask me. Now I'm in the student center contemplating suicide.

James came over last night and ate like literally half a bag of reese's cups. Then he talked about how he was in a chat room talking about aliens. I don't know it was weird.

I'm really thirsty. This has to be one of the lamest blog posts ever. I should put a warning on top that this blog post is totally lame.

Mondays

Many of you out there are probably asking yourselves one question: "why the hell is Alex up before 10 am?". Don't worry I am asking myself the same question. My roommate had to take her sister to the airport so her alarm went off at 6 so I am now wide awake and eating cookies. I took a shower and I'm about to blow dry my hair and then snuggle back up in bed.

I'm not going to name any names but somebody called me last night at 12:58am and asked if I was still awake. Needless to say I wasn't.

Well I really don't have anything interesting to put in here considering I just woke up, and I've had no human contact.

This Post Rated R for Sexual Explicitness

So I had a pretty brilliant idea this evening. I have this retractable cord blowdryer and whenever you pull the cord out it makes this cranking sound. Well my roommate was outside making kissy faces at her boyfriend and he was like "what was that sound?" and I was like "my crank powered dildo" and then I was like wow that's a great idea!! It would crank like one of those flashlights or cell phone chargers that crank for power. Then we were like "yeah but what if it runs out of power like halfway through use?" and then we laughed really hard and then I was like "I'm totally going to invent that and be a bizillionaire" and matt was like "not if I invent it first!" and then I was like "well I'm going to start inventing it right now" and my roommate was like "yeah I'm going to walk in and there are going to be like dildo blueprints all over the walls" I was like "man I can't wait to be rich" she goes "either you're going to be rich or very unsatisfying!"

True story...............

James came over tonight, but he didn't stay because my roommate has a test in the morning, I'm trying to be ultra quiet so she doesn't wake up. Like a ninja. I should be a ninja. I'm going to be a ninja.

Sleep

So my friend James called me last night and I invited him over. We went outside so he could smoke his cigar during which time a very drunk frat boy put his hand on my buttocks and tried to kiss me. Then we went back to my room and had a slumber party (I know what you're thinking, but James is gay so it was a totally G-rated slumber party!) We stayed up all night long talking. He told me about his whole life. Unbeknownst to me we had kept my poor roommate up all night as well. I feel really bad.

James has pink hair and a tattoo. He looks like the lead singer of Taking Back Sunday. He smokes wine flavored cigars and complains that his chest hair is wiry. He loves to talk about religion.

It sounds like I made him up, but I didn't. Ask Erin!