I Did Not Almost Get Arrested

Last night was sooooooooooooo awesome!!!! I'll write more about it later because I really don't feel very good right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!

adsfaS

yesssssss i got HOME ALMOST GOT ARRESTED!

Birthday

God could not have given me a prettier day. It's the perfect temperature. Big blue sky with cotton candy clouds.

15 Minutes

In 15 minutes I'll be 20. Ugh.

Today was a very good day. I don't know how tomorrow could top today!!! I went to all of my classes which were good I suppose. Went to Biology Lab which is always good thanks to biology lab assistant hottie pants face. Then I had dinner with Mariezy and Jordano. Unfortunately Hymen wasn't there.....sad! I saw a really hot guy that looked like Reggie Bush. Then we were watching this very funny video in the student center and this guy was like "I feel so bad asking this, but I really need 2 dollars and I'll give you these starbucks giftcards one has 10 dollars and one has 5 dollars I just really need 2 bucks" and I was like here's two dollars but don't worry about the giftcards. I thought it would be really unfair to take 15 dollars worth of giftcards just for 2 measly dollars worth of changed I scraped from the bottom of my purse. Then I went back to Steen and was sitting outside when Erin and Jen came by and we went to Wal Mart to get my cake and decorations for the partayyyyyy. The lady at Wal-Mart gave me the cake for free which was soooooooooooooooo nice! It has little mermaid on it!!!!! After that we came back to my room and were decorating and cleaning. Then we went to see Katie at Garner but she wasn't there. So we came back and then Katie came over and then we went back to Garner and then I went to Hall 14 with Jen where they were making cuppy cakes. I really should live in Hall 14 because it's way better than Steen. After that I came back here took a shower and now I'm about to read my poem for Brit Lit tomorrow, blow dry my hair and then go to sleep.

Only 8 minutes until I turn 20!!!!!!!

Hot Dude of the Day (Tuesday Wednesday Combo Edition)

There's something so irresistable about him.

Katie Tortilla Head

Ugh today was so boring. I am so tired of studying and reading and highlighting and taking notes and listening and reading really good poetry and thinking it means one thing but then learning it means something else completely different.

I'm tired of it. We went to Jalapeno tree today and we were all starving (Jen, Erin, Katie, Me) and so they brought us all the free tortillas and I was throwing them like frizbees to everyone and Katie was like "you eat it!" and I was like "no Katie take it!" and I threw it into the air and it fell right on Katie's head like a little Tortilla hat. It was so funnnnnnny! Then there was this old man at the table behind us and his phone went off and his ring tone was "Girls just want to have fun" and we laughed soooooooooooooo hard. I'm sorry that is one of the funniest things ever. Then as we were walking out there was this poor lady with an eye deformity and I tried to get my ice cream and it spilled everywhere and then as we were walking out Katie goes "I WAS TRYING NOT TO LOOK AT THAT WOMAN'S EYE!!!!!" and I was like you are so going to hell in a handbasket!!!!! Although I don't think she will. God Bless that woman, I'm going to say a prayer for her tonight.

Then I studied for a while and then talked with Jen at hall 14. We were studying but I seriously give up on biology. Everything I study flies out of my head the second it gets there. I really need spring break because at this rate things are not looking good. I thought Christmas break would help me, but I really think after spring break I will have my shit together. I have a glorious week to study for my test and Chesley's going to help me I'm going to make flashcards and study guides. I am going to make a 100 on this test if it's the last thing I ever do. I've decided that the president's honor roll is not going to happen this semester, but next semester when I am science and math free I am going to definitely be on it. I just have never excelled at math or science so I have accepted it. I am still striving for Dean's List which shouldn't be impossible at all at this point.

I had my first day of work today and I read a quiz for a blind girl. She has the cutest seeing eye dog. I felt like a real asshole though because I had just drank this big ass diet dr. pepper and I really had to pee so I just left her standing there and then I realized she had to sign my time sheet and she was like "I was just waiting for you" I was like "wow I'm an asshole"...................

Anyways longest blog post ever!!!! I am going to take a shower now and go back over my bio flashcards for lab tomorrow. Tomorrow's lab looks like one of the worst ever. I am so not going to like tomorrow. I don't even want to go to sleep that's how bad tomorrow looks! Yay for Thursday(my party) and Sunday(mom and daddy!!!!!!!!!!!!!0

Cuteness Overload!

http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2008/02/post-1.html

Nobody Even Reads This!

I've decided nobody reads my blog. That's fine because if it weren't my blog I probably wouldn't read it anyways. In two days I turn twenty. Try to wrap your head around that. I know I can't. I'm excited to see my parents this weekend. I have our whole day planned out in my head:
1)They arrive at around 10 am and then I show my mom my room and how clean it is and then we go to church at 11 am
2)12-12:30- We get out of church and then I give them the full campus tour
3)2-We take a drive around Nacogdoches and maybe go to the azalea gardens even though the flowers probably won't be blooming
4)We have dinner at my favorite restaurant
5)They give me my brand new car
6)We say goodbye and they leave and I cry

(Number 5 is not going to happen)

Other things that I need to do this weekend:Study for History Test, Study for my Government Test, Start reading that stupid book for History, Go over English Notes etc. etc.

I have so much tooooooooooo do!

Oh here's a funny story that you all will enjoy:
Katie(My BFF 1.0) knows this guy names prince Eric(asshole 5000) and somethign happened last weekend that was really rude on his part so to get him back I prank called him whilst I was drunk like 10 times. So he got all mad about it because he's like 39(his actual age!) and told Katie that I was pissing him off. Screw him. I'm sorry that you're 39 and don't know how to have fun. I'm sorry you're 39 and still a jackass. I'm sorry you're 39 and give 19 and 20 year old girls shots of patron. I'm sorry you're 39 and still in college.

What a dickhead.


Anyways fuck this blog.

Money, Money, Money, Must Be Funny

I get to work tomorrow. This is my first time reading at disabitily services. I'm happy because now I will be seven dollars richer!!!!!! Even if the person I'm reading for doesn't show up I still get the money!!!!!!! Most of you reading this are like "seven dollars?!", but that's a lot considering most jobs on campus are minimum wage and I only have to work for less than an hour. I just have to read a quiz and then mark down the answers and then leave. Seven dollars can buy me like two meals at wendy's or three meals at taco bell. It can buy seven tickets to the movies, it can buy a whole pizza, it can buy enough scantrons to get through the semester. It can buy a package of mechanical pencils, it can buy a used cd at hastings. It can buy a frozen hot chocolate at hastings and two packs of fruit stripe gum. I'm very excited about working.

I'll Know I'm Alive

Basically I just woke up like thirty minutes ago. Whatever. I had some of the strangest dreams I have ever had in my life last night. First of all I dreamed that nobody came to my party and I waited like three days with the pizzas waiting for people to come. Then Prince Eric came and I was like "oh no, you're not getting into the party" and my mom was like "you have to let him in!". So then he started to eat all of the pizza. Then I dreamed that I was in my room and all the cats were on the roof and it was raining so I let them all in and it turns out none of them were my cats!!!! Then in my dream for some reason Jordan and Marie drove by Steen and Jordan was like "wanna go get wendy's alex?" and I was like "I still have a bunch of pizza left!" and they drove off laughing at me.

I'm going to do my homework............

Last night would have been suicidally(is this a word?) boring without Katie!

KATIE

Katie pushed me off the bed and it really hurt Katie. Then she said I was a bitch and she hit me. KAtie hit me.

Space

When you look at my fish's bowl from a certain angle it looks as if he is suspended in black space. Just swimming around in black oblivion. I like to blow dry my hair and just look into his bowl.

Tonight was good. Marie and I chilled for like five hours. We ate and sang and then went to the student center. There was free pizza and drinks and we spent about an hour exploring. We saw hymen(the hot russian that works in the cafeteria) and took stalkerish pictures of him. He was mopping the stairs. It was really strange. I sang opera. I want to be an opera singer I have decided. Laugh if you want but it makes me happy. Nothing else exciting happened. I have read the Lady of Shallot about ten times now. My plan is to memorize it. I love it. I want to be it. Anyways Marie and I saw this movie and I think I was pissing Marie off because I was tired and didn't want to see the movie, then when we got in the theatre I complained the whole time about what a shitty movie it was.

It wasn't really that shitty. It's called Into the Wild and it stars this very hot dude. He plays this guy that graduates from college and decides for some mysterious reason to go to Alaska and live in the wild. There were some really good parts to the movie, and the acting wasn't bad, but it was narrated by the sister (played by Jena Malone) and she was soooooooooooooooo annoying. Everytime I heard her voice I thought my ears would bleed.

In five days I will be twenty. I hope life gets better after twenty or I'm in a world of hell.

Why Are We So Crunk?

Marie and I are crunk. It's basically a fact. There's a zoo in Nacogdoches and I bet you didn't know that!

Being American

I just got done voting!!! This is the first time in my life that I have voted so it's like a pretty big thing for me. I rocked that vote like no other.

Nothing else has happened today. I really don't have anything to rant about right now. Just stay tuned.

The Curse is Come Upon Me!

I Am Half Sick of Shadows

My father really made me mad tonight. I hate the fact that when things go bad he cares so much, but when things are going good he doesn't give a shit. I'm not talking to him for the rest of the weekend. I just really want to be left alone. If you want to call and criticize me just save your breath because I really just don't care.

For the next six days I am going to be a teenager and I'm going to act like one. I'm going to drink on weekdays and I'm going to act like I know everything even if I'm searching for the answers. I'm going to stay up late and wake up late. I'm going to laugh at things that are funny and cry at things that hurt me. I'm going to be continuously searching for the meaning to things, only to find out that they mean nothing.

I just can't wait for my mother to be here next sunday. I know I bash her sometimes, but there are just times in a girl's life where she needs her mother. Fathers are good for some things, but mothers understand, whereas fathers are always trying to understand. Some things in life you can't just try, you have to do them.

I gave myself tatoos tonight. I busted down a door only to realize that it was the wrong one. I drew naughty pictures on Katie's dry erase board. I drank five beers and smoked a cigarette. I made prank calls and told secrets. I had a good night, and nobody can take that from me.

Rainy Days

It's been raining and or clouding every single day of this week I swear. I straightened my hair today and the second I walked outside I looked like a french poodle. I went to biology and got my test back and I did a lot better than I though I had done!!!! There's still hoping of swinging an A in that class for sure!!!!!! Then I went to Brit Lit and we're starting on the Victorians which is like my faves(not!). I'm just going to be so glad when it's summer already and I'm sitting beside my pool getting skin cancer and reading whatever book I feel like reading. I just want that feeling of freedom.

I realized as I was turning my paper in today that I had forgot to put it into times new roman and I'm just really pissed off at myself. I hope she doesn't take off too many points for that because I'm human and I make mistakes. I really have to do laundry and I'll just save my next post for when I have something interesting to say.

Yawning

Just woke up and I'm about to head over to the library to print off my essay because I am all out of black ink here. If anyone would like to buy me ink for my printer my PO BOX is 9553..............

Bang Bang Shoot Shoot

I'm basically done with my paper, just some editing to do and then I'll be ready for tomorrow morning.

I lost my bet today that the Mavericks would win and that means no free Starbucks for me :(. Stupid Mavericks sucking so hard.

Now I'm eating chocolate and just trying to keep positive thoughts in my head.

Katie and Jen came and visited me so I could get a break from my creative process. I had five cigarettes today. Not good at all.

Led Zeppelin always sets me free.......................................

Happiness is a Warm Gun

I'm very angry right now and I feel like expressing myself through the written word. I was in biology lab which is where most of my stories arise from, and anyways the girl that sits at my table with me was being a complete _______. We have a quiz at the beginning of every lab and so we have these lap boards because we have to face the front of the room and basically it's like a nazi concentration camp in there. Anyways I asked her very very very nicely to hand me the lap board which is right behind her on top of hers in the cubby where they belong. The only energy this involves is reaching half an inch behind her and picking it up, but I guess that was just too much for Mrs. Potato Head. She grabs the lap board and throws it at me, and it hit my fucking hand. So I picked it up and was like whatever and then I looked and it had her number on it so I was like "this is yours" and politely handed it to her then she takes mine and throws it at me again!

I'm so mad about this that polite words can't even describe it. Whatever I hope she had a good dinner with her ex-boyfriend.

Nothing good happened today so I don't have anything to post on that front. The next person that messes with me today will get the full brunt of my unbrideled rage though so watch the fuck out!

Facebook

I'm in the library and the boys at the computer next to me are looking at some pictures on facebook and Ithink the girl isn't wearing panties and they are like "save that picture!"

True story

The Alex Cavnar Writing Process

I have all of my notes ready and I'm about to start writing my passage explication. It only has to be two-three pages so I mean it's really no big deal. I've been turing music on and off, lights on and off, flipping through my english book looking for inspiration. I decided to take a shower and brush my teeth, clean my body and clean my mind. Then I decided to look at youtube videos and listen to Elton John. I ate a cookie and then sang Little Mermaid. I'm finally ready to start writing. Here goes.................

Hot Dude of the Day

Things That Make Me Happy

When the Mavericks win. When I talk to my papa on the phone. When there are taco bowls in the cafeteria. When I'm with Mariezy and Jordan. When I'm watching the Mavericks win. When somebody walks past me and says something totally stupid. When I'm lonely and I see somebody I know. When people comment on my blog. When I don't want to talk to people so I pretend not to see them and they pretend right back. When I have Diet Dr. Pepper in my room. When I get a text message. When I get an e-mail that's not spam. When I'm quoted in the pine log. When my roommate talks about "Ma". When I get to see my little Weezer Boy. When my mother is actually nice to me on the phone. When people remember to invite me somewhere that I really want to go. When my fish stays alive. When I'm in the library and it is completely silent. When I make a good grade on a test that I studied my ass off for. When I make a better grade than somebody that studied harder than me. When I am at church. When I am at church and there's a baby in front of me making faces. When I go to Ihop. When it's raining and I actually have an umbrella. When I wake up in the morning and my hair doesn't require straightening(this is hypothetical, it's never happened, but if it ever did it would make me sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy). When my hair looks semi-presentable. When Russian dudes tell Marie that thier name is Hymen. When my phone rings and it's somebody totally unexpected. Whenever I'm at Katie's and I get to write perverted things on her dry erase board. When I listen to Led Zeppelin. When I actually get something in my mailbox(this is also hypothetical!). When I see a squirell eating a nut. When I see a squirell scrathing its back in the dirt. When I see a squirell climbing up a tree. When a squirell attacks me and I have a funny story to tell everybody.

Why I Hate Tuesdays

I just took my biology test and I'm about to go take my Brit Lit test. Wow two tests in one day this is a first for me. I've had like four tests in one week but never two in one day. It's not very amazing or wonderful if you ask me. Now I'm in the student center contemplating suicide.

James came over last night and ate like literally half a bag of reese's cups. Then he talked about how he was in a chat room talking about aliens. I don't know it was weird.

I'm really thirsty. This has to be one of the lamest blog posts ever. I should put a warning on top that this blog post is totally lame.

Studying

It smells like a fart in the library. A smelly old man fart, and the old man just ate a whole pot of cabbage stew.

I Tried My Best to Leave This All on Your Machine

I was almost late for class. I went back to sleep after I took a shower just like I planned, but I didn't wake up until like five minutes before I had to leave. My class is way on the other side of the known galaxy so I had to hightail it. I get really pissed off in the mornings because the stairs that I walk down lead directly to the tour room where they show off the fake room to people that are taking a tour of campus. There's always a shitload of people down there and they seem to not understand that I am in a hurry and that they need to move the fuck out of my way. (my no-cussing policy has obviously left the building) So I come storming out the door today into a group of crowded touring assholes and I accidentely knocked into this one big bertha bitch and I was like "sorry" and kept going and she was like "Damn why you in so big a hurry?!?!" I seriously hope that after I shoved her she decides not to go here because the last thing we need on this campus is another girl that likes to walk slow and in everyone's way!

I made it to class. We didn't get our tests back which is just fine with me because I would rather not know what I made. Ignorance is bliss, and in this case I am fucking blissful. Went to American Government where we talked about a bunch of other shit I couldn't give less of two donkey dicks about. Finally made it out of classes alive, come to my room to just enjoy the peace and quiet that is 3:15 in Steen Hall. Everyone's either out having lunch, at class, or jacking off, whichever it is I'm just glad I don't have to listen to them.

I'm going to have a party in my room next Thursday to celebrate my twentieth fucking year of being alive. There's going to be food and drinks(non-alchoholic because I don't get drunk on Thursdays, oh and also that would be illegal because like I said above it's only my 20th birthday) we might do something fun, but I doubt it because I will be much too sad thinking about how I pissed away twenty years of my life being young and semi-retarded. If you're reading this you're invited, unless you are a creeper in which case stop creeping and get a life. Marie and Jordan are going to be there and you know that when they are there the party is on like donkey kong. Wear whatever the hell you want, and don't expect my room to look nice or anything because you're not that special.

Wow this post was extraordinarly venemous and I loved it.

Hot Dude of the Day

Who's Afraid of a Large Black Man?

In case you didn't know that's the name of his book. I saw it at the dollar store once and I thought about paying a dollar for it.......................thought being the key word.

I still love you though Chuck!! I also think you're way hot enough for hot dude of the day!

Mondays

Many of you out there are probably asking yourselves one question: "why the hell is Alex up before 10 am?". Don't worry I am asking myself the same question. My roommate had to take her sister to the airport so her alarm went off at 6 so I am now wide awake and eating cookies. I took a shower and I'm about to blow dry my hair and then snuggle back up in bed.

I'm not going to name any names but somebody called me last night at 12:58am and asked if I was still awake. Needless to say I wasn't.

Well I really don't have anything interesting to put in here considering I just woke up, and I've had no human contact.

Feeling Better & Watching the All Star Game

So I'm finally starting to feel better. I went over to Katie's and saw a really good movie called Martian Child. It has one of my fave actors John Cusack. Then Katie and I went to Wal Mart and had fun with cucumbers!!!!

I've been psuedo studying for my biology test today, and I'm about to get started on a rough draft of my passage explication. I changed Malachi's water just now and I'm checking to make sure he doesn't die. I was all pouring the water out of his bowl into the sink and he tried to swim out of the bowl!!! What a naughty little fish!!! Luckily I had the net on top of the bowl to make sure he didn't sneak out!!!!

This week is really going to suck! I have two tests, a paper due, and probably one of the hardest bio labs ever coming up. I just can't wait until the year is over so if I ever see my lab teacher I can tell her to go F#$@ herself.

Alright well I'm gonna get back to writing my paper and watching the All Star Game on TNT. The best thing about watching TNT is that they always play the charles barkeley commercials, and he's basically one of my most favorite people ever invented.

It's really hot in my room

How evil are you?

Wow

Things are just getting progressively worse over here................

Ugh

I've been sick all day, and had uncontrollable diaherea which is gross to put on my blog I know, but I mean I just want you all to know how much it has really sucked.

Then I was on the toilet for like 30 minutes and my mom calls and is like "I'm supposed to meet your dad at LaMadeline and he hasn't called me and I just don't know where he is!" So I tried to call like three times and I called her back and was like "I can't get a hold of him what if he's dead?!?!" and she was like " I hate you , why do you say stuff like that!??!" so she calls me back three times to tell me what a bitch I am for saying that and how she still can't get a hold of him. Then finally she calls and is like "he left his cell phone at home, he's here".

My mom has got to be the world's biggest B&#$@, she acted like it was my fault that he was dead and didn't answer his phone! So now I just took some more pepto bismol and I'm about to go back to Jen's room which is where I was watching movies when I had to come back to my dorm because I didn't want to have diaherea in the community bathrooms in hall fourteen.

Hot Dude of the Day

I still feel like shit by the way. Dwight Howard is oh so sexy though!

Through the Storm

So last night I walked from the Student Center back to my place of residence through a thunder storm. I sat down on my computer like I always do, but then I felt really really really really tired. As if I had taken like three nyquils or something. So I was like "Well I'll just go to bed I guess" even though it was a friday at 10:00 pm. So my roommate comes in like at 11 something and kind of woke me up, and I was literally shaking under my two comforters and sheets. I just thought maybe it was cold in my room like it always is so I went back to sleep. Then I got a text message at like 12 "what are you doing?" and I texted the person back and was like "dude I think I'm really sick".

So all night long I was tossing the covers off, then pulling them back on because I was freezing. My head's banging and I just feel like all around shit.

I think Bill Clinton made me sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So anyways, I slept for over 12 hours and I'm about to go lay back in bed. If anyone reads this will you please bring me some gatorade to my room!?!?!? I don't have anything but Diet Dr. Peppers and I really don't want to drink those. SOS SOS SOS.

Oh yeah, I had a dream last night that a certain ex-boyfriend tried to kill me and that I ended up shooting him in the face. Creepy.

My Hand

I just touched Bill Clinton's hand!!!!!!!!

Hot Dude of the Day

Yes please!

Today is the Day!

What's up everyone?!?!? OMG do you know what I just realized?!?!? It's friday and I just ate my leftover calzone with sausage in it. Crapsicles. Okay well that sucks.

Anyways today is really exciting. First of all because I know you are all dying to know how I did on my test: it was not as bad as I expected although I knew she would give us the two prompts that I was least prepared to write an essay about, but being the master of collegiate level writing that I am I scraped together an a-flippin-mazing essay that will probably singe the hair off of Dr. Cooper's eyebrows. I feel like sooooooo good now that the test is over. I was going to take a nap, but screw that I just had two cans of diet dr. pepper and I am feeling great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In other news Bill Clinton is coming to SFA today. Can you seriously believe that?!?! This is probably the biggest thing that has ever happened in Nacogdoches ever. I don't even like Bill Clinton or Hillary Clinton, but still this is big. BIG! I'm going to be in the front row, and hopefully I will be able to see some hot secret service men. OMG! I'm sooooooo excited!! They had the news trucks all lined up outside the student center, and then there was a man in a black suit in the barnes and noble and I asked if he was with the secret service and he said "no, I'm here for the social work conference", but I'm pretty sure that was just his cover.

Well that's it for right now, but I'll definitly have more later, hopefully a picture of me with the King Pimp himself President Bill Clinton!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Katie&Prince Eric

So I spent the night at Katie's last night because Prince Eric was like "well I think I'm gonna come over". There's a long story behind this, but basically we went to his room and knocked on the door and his roommate was like "I'm naked!!!" and we were like "okay whatever can we come in?" and his rooommate was like "no I'm naked!" and we were like "okay is prince eric there?" and he was like "why the fuck would prince eric be here if I was naked?" and we wer elike "okay whatever we're leaving him a note!" and then his roommate was like "what's your names?" and we were like whatever we're leaving a note!" soo I started writing him a note asking if he wanted to go to the movies with all of us tonight and we could hear his roommate on the phone like "yeah dude, I told them I was naked and now they won't leave!" and so we left the note and like 10 minutes later prince eric called Katie and was like "Sorry my roommate had his girlfriend over for valentine's day" and we were like ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. So prince Eric came over and he was super drunk and we watched the mavericks/suns game and he was rooting for the suns :(. Then the mavericks lost but whatever. So omg I have so many funny things that Eric said last night:

"I was going to staple your pants to the wall and then when people were like 'who's are these' I would be like Alex's!"

"What's that? your taint?!?! Cause it taint your ass and it taint your pussy"

(while pushing his own head into Katie's lap) "NO KATIE! I don't want to give you a blow jobber
!"

"I have three testicles!"

"I asked my roommate if I could see his weiner, but he wouldn't let me!"

(as we were walking outside)"oh my god someone stole my truck! Oh wait, that's not my truck!"

Anyways good times good times. I'm gonna go get ready for class and for my test today!

Well

I was kind of really concerned about this test tomorrow, but now I'm not so much. I made flashcard thingies for the test, and I wikipedia'd things that I still needed to know from lectures I skipped. Although I completly fucked myself over by not studying these past like three weeks, I got lucky because the teacher gave us a study guide thingy so I was able to look up things I still needed to know.

I don't feel as bad now, but I still have a weight on my shoulders. It'll probably be there until like next thursday when my passage explication is due. Then I'm going to get my drink on lol. I just hate how much stress I'm under trying to raise my GPA so I can be on the president' honor roll next semester.

I really need a cigarette. I know that sounds horrible, but it's true and I don't care.

Studying......

So I have a test tomorrow so no posts probably tonight at all!!! Sorry :( I saw my dad today though!!!!!!!

This Post Rated R for Sexual Explicitness

So I had a pretty brilliant idea this evening. I have this retractable cord blowdryer and whenever you pull the cord out it makes this cranking sound. Well my roommate was outside making kissy faces at her boyfriend and he was like "what was that sound?" and I was like "my crank powered dildo" and then I was like wow that's a great idea!! It would crank like one of those flashlights or cell phone chargers that crank for power. Then we were like "yeah but what if it runs out of power like halfway through use?" and then we laughed really hard and then I was like "I'm totally going to invent that and be a bizillionaire" and matt was like "not if I invent it first!" and then I was like "well I'm going to start inventing it right now" and my roommate was like "yeah I'm going to walk in and there are going to be like dildo blueprints all over the walls" I was like "man I can't wait to be rich" she goes "either you're going to be rich or very unsatisfying!"

True story...............

James came over tonight, but he didn't stay because my roommate has a test in the morning, I'm trying to be ultra quiet so she doesn't wake up. Like a ninja. I should be a ninja. I'm going to be a ninja.

Wednesday

So today sucked. I hated today. First of all the Mavericks are going to trade Devin Harris. That makes me sad because he's my fav. I love him. Also I did really shitty in biology and I sit next to this dude and all he does all flipping class is talk about what losers everyone else is. It really gets me down. My lab assistant is still hot though. He was totally talking about spermenation or something, it was hot. He's hot.

Then I went to dinner with Marie and Jordan and something so horrible happened that I can't even write it in my blog. So then I did a video confession about my day in Jordan's room. Then we took crazy pictures.

I really wish that I had something interesting to talk about but I really don't. My daddy is coming from D-town to visit me tomorrow so I am happy about that!!!

Hot Dude of the Day

Hahahaha that's my dad.

Delicious

These are my most favorite things in the world

Alex Land

I totally got some pancakes! YES!!! My friend Chris ended up taking us, and we had to wait like an hour for our food, but I got it and it was delicious. I did most of my homework that I needed to do although I still have one chapter to read for my business class, but it's only 11:20 so I'm in good shape as far as that goes. I'm going to get to class really early so that those girls don't steal my seat.

Ohhhhh and my dad is coming to eat lunch with me on Thursday!!! I'm really excited about that, only that's just going to make my freaking week & especially Brit Lit on thursday go by that much slowerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Okay well it's studying time so I will see you all in the morning. I still have to scrape something up for my Creative Writing Club meeting friday, but I think I'm going to write a poem in rima terza just like Percy Shelley.

GOOD NIGHT BLOG!

Hot Dude of the Day

Pfft like this is going to come as a surprise to anyone!

Tuesdays & Being Kick Ass

You know it's not going to be a good day when it's raining, you're five minutes late to class, and you can't find your umbrella (ella ella......). I made it to all of my classes though!! I can't say I was concious during all of them, but I made it an that's what counts. I'm pretty sure every time I'm in biology lecture my professor either talks about sperm, vaginas, sex, or peeing. I'm pretty sure he's a pervert. So after my classes I went to the library and took a kick ass library nap. Then I went and got a kick ass strawberry muffin from Einstein's. Then I went to my kick ass room where Erin and her boyfriend were watching some movie. I talked to my kick ass sober sister about an article I read about Lil Wayne in which he was quoted as saying "I'm such a good rapper that when I hear my rhymes I wanna kill somebody!" I thought it was hilarious. What else happened????? Nothing much but I'm about to make my way back to the library (in case you didn't know I'm going to start living there!) so that I can study for my history test on Friday. I was getting all ready to have a kick ass weekend, but it turns out I have a not so kick ass English paper due next Thursday so I'll probably be working on it all weekend. My teacher is hard core and I'm going to write the most kick ass paper she has ever read and it will blow her F*#($*#@ mind! I've decided I don't use enough pictures on my blog so from now on I will be adding a hot dude picture of the day.

PS- Basketbawful one of my most favourite bloggers of all time totally commented on my blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Basically the funniest most kick ass blog in the world......well besides mine of course http://www.basketbawful.blogspot.com/ follow the link!!!! Okay well I'm off to the library and then IHOP night with the bitches.

Sometimes You Wanna Go.............

I'm really homesick today and I don't even know why. I just miss being home where there's always food and money(well not always). I miss being at home where people can be mean sometimes but at least you know they love you. I miss being home where I can watch every mavericks game with my dad. I miss being home where I can take trips to Wal-Mart with my mom. I miss being home where I can sleep for 15 hours undisturbed. I miss being home where someone else washes my dirty clothes. I miss my little Weezer boy and Mama Kitty. Sometimes I wish Weezer boy lived in my dorm room so that I could just hold him and kiss him whenever I want. It would totally be worth having to clean out his stinky cat box. But knowing my luck he would end up loving my roommate more that me. I miss my daddy and my mom.

I'm just really homesick. Anyways my roommate hates me now in case anyone was wondering or cares. I'm seriously considering just ending it all today. Slitting both my wrists open or swallowing a whole bottle of benadryl. Ohhhhh last night in the cafeteria they had these delicious blondie brownies with m&m's. So that made my night, and I got to hang out with homegirl Marie. She's totally going to write an article with a quote from me!!! So everyone should pick up the pine log thursday!!!!!

Okay well I have to go get ready for biology. Everyone have a good day, more later!

Mondays

I hate mondays. No this is not going to be a long list of things I hate, I just wanted to put that out there. I fell asleep during my Government class and drooled all over my notes. I made it to all of my classes though which was a miracle. Then I met this poor guy and he was walking around without any shoes. So I was like "where are your shoes homeboy?" and he was like "they died" and I thought maybe he was pulling my leg so I was like "seriously though where are your shoes?" and he was like "they fell apart" and I was like "well don't you have a backup pair?" and he was like "well I have a pair of broken flip flops and I'm going to tie some cloth around them so they will last me until I make some money" I was like so sad for this boy. Then I saw him walking out of the building without any shoes. I called my dad to tell him and he said that I should have offered to buy him a pair of shoes, and I guess I should have. I don't know what I was thinking I'm always too concerned if someone is messing with me.

Anyways I am really very tired right now so I am going to play a game on the computer, and then read for English tomorrow, and then go to sleep foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I <3 MY DADDY! And I don't think he's a jerk.

Sleep

So my friend James called me last night and I invited him over. We went outside so he could smoke his cigar during which time a very drunk frat boy put his hand on my buttocks and tried to kiss me. Then we went back to my room and had a slumber party (I know what you're thinking, but James is gay so it was a totally G-rated slumber party!) We stayed up all night long talking. He told me about his whole life. Unbeknownst to me we had kept my poor roommate up all night as well. I feel really bad.

James has pink hair and a tattoo. He looks like the lead singer of Taking Back Sunday. He smokes wine flavored cigars and complains that his chest hair is wiry. He loves to talk about religion.

It sounds like I made him up, but I didn't. Ask Erin!

Today

Today was so boring! I hate Sundays. I hate Nacogdoches. I hate being unproductive. I hate headaches. I hate boys who wear girl pants. I hate girls who wear mini skirts with ugg boots. I hate when people never update thier blog/website. I hate Valentine's day. I hate cell phones. I hate not having a car. I hate homework. I hate school. I hate food because it makes me fat. I hate when the mavericks lose. I hate when the mavericks play and I can't watch it. I hate when I prank call people and they don't answer the phone. I hate babies that smell bad. I hate people that smell bad. I hate people that steal things. I hate liars. I hate the truth. I hate coffee because it smells so good and tastes so bad. I hate vodka. I hate cranberry juice and vodka. I hate having a hangover because of cranberry juice and vodka. I hate when friends don't call you. I hate when they do call. I hate when I call somebody and they aren't doing anything interesting. I hate when people think they know me, or have me figured out in any way. I hate when you don't even know if someone is alive. I hate that my new fish will die just like my old fish did. I hate death. I hate when I run out of hot cocoa. I hate hemmoroids. I hate steroids. I hate the way people look at me while I'm doing crunches in the gym. I hate that I have hairy man feet. I hate that I have small boobs. I hate people with big boobs. I hate that Dirk Nowitzki is so sexy. I hate that guys that stalk me generally aren't (sexy that is). I hate stalkers. I hate that all of my writing will never be as good as Graham Greene's. I hate social workers because they are liars. I hate when things break. I hate the way it smells when my dad burns pop tarts. I hate that I'm getting older and older and older every second of the day. I hate biology. I hate people who teach biology. I hate hot boys in biology who are so hot. I hate loud ringtones. I hate hospitals. I hate blood that gets into my mouth. I hate Hello Kitty products that are expensive. I hate cavities. I hate root canals. I hate my big nose. I hate my fat fingers that can't type. I hate guys that have boners in the gym. I hate sluts. I hate guys that date sluts. I hate magicians. I hate magic. I hate mardi gras. I hate the way beer tastes. I hate people that tell my roommate that I do drugs. I hate people that send me 9849039834 messages on facebook when they know I gave it up for lent. I hate when I sit in the hallway and don't even see goldilocks.

I hate everything

Last Night

Wow. That is all I have to say about last night. I totally met some guy oustide of Steen though and his name is James and he has pink hair!!!!! Things like that happen to me because I'm like a moth to a flame when people have pink hair!!!

I totally had a dream last night that I tried out for American Idol and that I made it!!! Then every time we were about to go on air for some reason I had just gotten out of a shower and like didn't have any makeup on. So then I would have to do my makeup and hair all by myself and all the other contestants hated me except for Jordan who was also one of the contestants. She helped me with my makeup because it got all smudged. Then we got into a big fight though because Marie decided she wanted to go help Jordan and not me!!!!!!! It was really weird. Then at one point I was next to the swimming pool and like trying to get to the American Idol building for my performance and my hair and makeup were all done and I was dressed up and so these guys kept trying to splash me.

Anyways I'm gonna go take a shower and work on homework.

Our New Fish!

I got a new fishie today to replace Mobius Dylan Dick (RIP!) his name is Malachi Leviticus Cavanbothom. Which in case you don't know my last name is Cavnar and Erin's last name is Higginbothom so we just combined our names! I'm about to go out and get Crunk at Lizzie's apartment!!!

Cleaning

So my room is now nice and spiffy clean, but I'm pooped. Our bathroom looks so clean and fresh!! Erin bought a new bath rug and I spent like two hours scrubbing the filth from the shower. Now I'm about to take a shower and get ready to study and then go out tonight to see one of my good friends Lizzie!!! I haven't seen her since before Christmas and she totally moved away and so it might be my last time to see her for a while!!!!

I talked to my dad earlier and he was kind of being a little rude on the phone because he's sick. I'm sorry he's sick, but that doesn't mean he can be rude!!!!! I swear whenever men get sick they are always so dramatic!!!!!!

Also I'm pretty sure my Aunt Mary commented!!!!!!!!!! Basically my favourite Aunt of all time!!! So shout out to her, even though I haven't seen her in a million years!!!!

Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting

So I just woke up, and I'm eating a very nutritious breakfast of m&m's with diet dr. pepper. I really don't feel like walking all the way to the cafeteria.

So last night I was hanging out with Marie & Jordan and thier fried Stevie was there and she was talking about Dane Cook and how he has this joke where everyone has a friend that they all hate. Like "Oh my gosh Brian's coming to the party! Ugh I hate Brian!" and everyone's like "yeah we know but we couldn't just not invite him" and then Dane Cook's like well if you never hear that then you're that friend. So now I'm going to be very paranoid for like the rest of my life about being "that friend". Why do people even have to have a "that friend" anyways!?!?! I mean if you don't like the person, and you hate hanging out with them than you should just tell them so that they won't waste thier time and they can go find real friends that like to hang out with them right?!?!?!?!?!?!? So anyways I read this really good bible verse last night before I went to bed and I wanted to share it with everyone before I start on my day of cleaning and studying........

"For whosoever are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God"
-Romans 8:14

So I hope everyone has a good day, and I'll post all about my day later tonight so stay tuned!

PS- I totally saw Bee Movie and Fool's Gold last night and they were both really good movies!

Getting Crunk!

Ugh I am seriously tired. I feel really good about today because I didn't cuss as much as yesterday. Although I had a few slip ups, but it's going really good. I haven't been on facebook either!!! I went to class and then played tennis with Eriniqua and Jenaynay which was fun although we didn't get to play that long. Then they went to some banquent and I went and saw Bee Movie with Jordan & Marie. It was a really good movie, although I almost fell asleep. Then we went to this bathroom next to the ballroom in the student center because Marie and Jordan didn't believe me that there were couches in there!! Then I had a really bad gas problem which was hilarious. Then I went and saw anotherrrrrrrrr movie with Erin and Jen (Fool's Gold) which was not as funny as I had anticipated, but it was really action packed and suspenseful. Then we went to Wal-mart where we saw some crackheads and a man that looks like Deron Williams. Then we harassed some people walking on the side of the road. Now I'm about to go get my beauty rest!!!!!!!!!!

I just had inspiration for a good story so I'm going to jot that down along with my other 695968948 ideas.

I'm also about 1/4 of the way through the first book of LOTR, which is kind of dorky I know, but it's getting interesting!!!!! I totally missed my meditation today, but I guess I'll do it now before bed even though it's technically Saturday already!

Hell

By the way is hell a bad word?!?!?!?!

Living in Steen

So I've decided I really hate Steen. It is hands down the worst dorm on campus. Besides the fact that people put one pair of jeans into the washer and leave them there for five days, and people steal your beautiful handmade Christmas wreath and hold it hostage until you buy them pizza and dr. pepper, there's a real problem. We all know what it is: the fire alarms. This morning I was abruptly woken up by the fire alarm at 6:30AM!!!!! I wanted to lay down and die seriously. It was about ten degrees outside and I felt like a baby being ripped from a mother's womb! On top of that we saw goldilocks who for some reason always looks just sooooo chipper during the fire alarms. On top of that all when we got back into the room fifteen minutes later the fire alarm went off three more times. Well by this time my roommate and I decided to just ignore it because it is getting out of hand. I'm scared that one day it might actually be a real fire, and because the fire department have never once showed up to a fire alarm the whole building will probably burn down. It doesn't help that the guys that live next door to us are pyromaniacs who covered up thier smoke detectors with towels and duct tape and try to smoke tea(yes tea!).

Anyways I took my test and it was the easiest test of all time. Now I'm about to take a shower because my dad didn't call me this morning to wake me up like he said he would so I was almost late for my test, and thus I couldn't take a shower.

Oh yeah, one last thing before I go, this is definitly going to be a rant so brace yourselves!!!!! Last week which as most of you know was like the third week of school I went to go sit in my usual spot during business class and these two girls (who I have a few worse names than girls for them, but I'm going to refrain from cursing during these forty days of lent) had decided they liked my seat better than wherever they had decided to sit the first flipping three weeks. So now I have to sit in the back corner next to this guy who looks like a pothead and who doesn't bring either pencil or paper to the lecture..................... I strongly dislike both of these girls, and today when I went to sit into my seat the redheaded girl gave me a look like she wanted me to die, omg I have so many things I want to write here but I seriously can't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just smiled at her and then shoved her stupid backpack out of my way. OH yeah, and the other girls that sits in front of me: your cough is disgusting you really need to go to the doctor because it's gross that you always cough everywhere and then decided you want to stretch and then hit my freaking binder everytime and you don't even say sorry. I really want to find a different seat but it's kind of almost the second month of school so it would be really messed up to go steal someone else's seat. So I'm just going to get there really early from now on and sit in my old seat and then when old redhead comes in I'm just going to give her a go to hell look when she walks down the aisle and see how she likes it................

Okay well I'll update later to tell you all how delicious my frozen hot chocolate was............be jealous!

Door Decorations & Getting Crunk with the Homegirls

So I totally have a test in the morning, but whatever I'm going to post this and then go to bed........................ First of all I went to myheritage.com because I was telling Erin and Katie how people say I look like Carnie freaking Wilson so we did this celebrity morph and it turned out I look like mariah carey (hahahahahaha). Then we did Dirk Nowitzki and it turns out he only looks 86% like himself.......... Then we decorated our door with Shia Labeouf, Harrison Ford, David Beckham, Dane Cook, and Tom Brady's head attached to some random guys six pack. Then we totally put a Zac Efron picture on the door of the guys that live next to us. They're totally going to love it!!!

I'm semi-nervous about my test in the morning, I mean I didn't exstensively study like I do for most tests, but it's a business class so it's pretty straightforward and the one Quiz that we took I made a 100% so I think I'll do good on it..........

I went to the library for about an hour and studied just trying to go over the vocab words in the book and the different factors of production and what not, and these two girls decided to sit down at the table next to mine and have a nice loud discussion. Last time I checked the library was for reading and studying and not for you to freaking catch up on the last episode of Gossip Girl...............It really really really really makes me mad.

So anyways tomorrow I am totally going to get a frozen hot chocolate from Hastings and it's going to be delicious. And I'm going to party like a rockstar with Marie and Jordan. Although Saturday they're going to a party that I was totally not invited to but whatever.

Well I only have thirty minutes left to do my Lent Meditation for day 2 so I better get on that right away!!!!!!!!!!!

// The Mortified Shoebox Show //

Alex Land

So before I begin reflecting on the first half of my day I have to tell you all about the hilarious thing that happened to me in the Steen Lobby! I was walking to my room and this boy walked by listening to his iPod and he was all dancing and so I started dancing too because dancing is like my absolute favorite thing ever! Then he was like "nah nah, you better chill!" and then he and his friends laughed. It was pretty funny, and I'm pretty sure he's just jealous of my ill moves! So anyways the first half of my day kind of sucked although something really good happened!!! Our suitemates moved out so now we have the whole bathroom to ourselves!!! I'm so happy because now I won't have to listen to really loud music at eight or two in the morning anymore!!!! Also I can leave my trash can and shampoo and soaps in there without being afraid of someone throwing thier trash in my can or using my shampoo(well besides Erin!) So that was a good part of my day, and also I only cursed five times, one of which was because Jen gave me an F for the day in biology right after I gave her an A+!!!!!!! Thanks Jen! Then Dr. Godwin started talking about invagination (look it up in the dictionary) which was really hilarious. Finally I went to British Literature with the wonderful (and very pregnant) Dr. Escobar. I loved the poem we read but I guess everyone else hated it because Dr. Escobar was like "You all can leave early because you look bored out of your skulls!" I wanted to be like "pffft, not me!" but I didn't because I never talk in that class for fear of looking like a complete idiot. IDK, maybe it's just me but I love sonnets and poems that have some semblance of order and organization. They just make sense, and being someone that likes to write poetry myself I appreciate how hard it is to get your abbc eded's all perfect and rhyming(it's not easy!) so I tend to enjoy reading the tercets and the couplets much more than just a free form rhyme...................

And just to keep everyone updated I DID NOT get on facebook today which is almost two whole days in a row!!!! WOW!!!!!! Now I am going to take a nap so that I can get ready to study all night for my business test tomorrow morning!

Oh wait! One more wonderful thing happened today: I actually knew all of the answers to Dr. Escobar's Quiz which is a first!!! Also she handed back last weeks quizzes and I totally got half credit for answering that the mariner in rhyme of the ancient mariner wanted to become a baker because he loved cupcakes!!! Thank you Dr. Escobar!

More on life here in Alex land later!

Kate Nash

Okay I'm totally supposed to be getting ready for Bio Lecture right now, but I really just wanted everyone to know that Kate Nash's "Pumpkin Soup" is my new favorite song! Okay I really should go put some clothes on now!!!!!!!!!!! Everyone have a good day in class!

Sacrifices

As most of you know (that means probably the only person reading my blog right now which is Marie!) I've given up facebook and cursing for lent, and so far it's going really well. I haven't been on Facebook all day, and as far as cursing goes it's been a better day than normal. Facebook is easy to give up. I just delete it from my internet history and it's gone. Cursing/Cussing on the other hand is pretty hard. Sometimes I just want to say the F-word or call a girl a B*&$#, and honestly sometimes they deserve it. It's hard to reprogram my brain to say "poo" instead of S$%@, but I wonder if I should be replacing these words with other less vulgar words or just stop saying vulgar things altogether?!?!?! I really don't think I'm the kind of person that calls someone a B&%#@ and really means it; I honestly just like to hear myself talk sometimes................... Do I even feel like it's a sacrifice giving up cussing??!?! No not at all because it will make me a better person.
Now do I think it's a sacrifice giving up Facebook?!?! YES! Because it's something I really love and enjoy doing even though I know it my heart it's a waste of time!!!! Then again I think sacrificing just a tiny piece of myself for a God that sacrificed EVERYTHING for me is not so bad. It'll probably make me a better less selfish person..............
On a lighter note today I was in Biology Lab (FUN!) and we were doing this experiment and for some reason I got put in charge of doing this experiment with this nasty blood and I was putting the slide cover on the slide and blood splattered onto my tongue!! I SWEAR!!! It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo nasty! I almost threw up, but then the lab assistant(who is one of the sexiest men of all time) was like "just swallow it, it's sythetic blood" First of all I have no idea how blood can be synthetic so if someone could explain this to me it would be really great, and second I'm no scientist but this is the second time he's told me to swallow something in lab and I'm starting to have my doubts about him............................................................
Well that's about it for now, hopefully I will be able to post earlier tomorrow. I'm off to read the new little booklet that I got at church today. Oh yeah Marie if you are reading this did you hear me scream at you from outside the phonejacks building?!?!?!??!?! HAHAHA!

Realizations

So tonight was Ash Wednsday, and being the wonderful Catholic that I am I went to the mass. During which the priest told us all a story about how you have to really dig deep into yourself over Lent to try and find the treasure buried deep inside of you. So I've started trying to dig into myself (not literally!) to find the treasure. I think it's going to be a long forty days!!!!! I did come to two realizations today: 1)I'm a hypochondriac 2)I'm definitely not ready to have children.
For some reason I always feel sick. I think it has a lot to do with my very active imagination. Sometimes people around me will talk about being sick and I will start to have all the symptoms. Just a couple of nights ago I was crying in front of the computer because I had diagnosed myself with hyperthyroidism (thank God for Web MD!). Seriously though, I would just for once like to have like a very thorough physical so that I will know once and for all that I don't have Cancer, or Diabetes, or Hyperthyroidism, or Breast Cancer (all of which I have diagnosed myself with just this past week!).
The second thing came to me because I was hanging out with my roommate and all of her friends(who are basically my friends now whether they like it or not!) One of the girls in thier sorority has a daughter and she was there, and while she's very cute and I had fun holding her, she kept farting and it kind of smelled, and then she fell asleep and my friends was carrying her downstairs and I was just like "Thank God I don't have to worry about changing diapers and keeping another human being clothed and fed!" I mean we all know I have trouble with that myself!!!!!!
So I guess those are two really good things to realize. I think with the whole hypochondriac thing it's best to just think healthy, and then I'll feel healthy!!!!! With the baby thing.........well I think we all know how to prevent that!

Soooooooooooooo

As of tomorrow I will officially write in this blog every day! It'll kind of be like a diary of my experiences and life. Sometimes amazing things happen to me, and sometimes really shitty stuff happens. Either way it will give me something to do now that I've given up Facebook for Lent, and who knows I might like this better than Facebook and that would rock! I've had a few other blogs in the past, but I always gave them up after a few days because I expected them to become famous within literally hours of creation. This time around I'll set my expectations a little bit lower..................................